The root of jealousy

jealousy.pngJealousy is an emotion that is a combination of several emotions.

Often it is a combination of anger, resentment, inadequacy, helplessness and disgust.

Originally it was a synonym for envy. Nowadays both feelings often mean the same.

But since jealousy has „adapted“ to our society it is now mostly referred to experiences in relationships.

Even infants of 5 years and older and animals experience it.

We have to distiguish between jealousy and envy. envy-jealousy.png

Jealousy is when you fear that you might loose something that you posses(usually a relationship) because of another person.

e.g. A toddler has a sibling that gets carried around more than him.

Envy is when you feel that you lack a attribute another person has.

e.g. A toddler want to play with a toy another child is playing with

Jealousy consists of very strong emotions and has been an inspiration for many artworks, such as paintings, music and poetry.

Romantic jealousy refers to feelings that have their source in relationships. Sometimes the deeper the relationship, the bigger the jealousy can get.

Even though there are cases of extreme jealousy, some people never experience it.

Sexual jealousy refers to feelings that are triggered when a person’s partner shows interest in another person.

Experts often say that sexual jealousy is a biological factor, as nobody wants their potential mate to lose interest.

In movies and book men are often portrayed as abnormal jealous but there is no difference between female and male jealousy.

The only difference is that women often react to emotional betrayal that they imagine and men react to actual sexual betrayal or imagined sexual betrayal.

herz.pngBut anyone who experienced jealousy once knows that jealousy kills a relationship. It makes us worry and disbelieve what the partner says.

It misleads us to snooping and sometimes even spying on our partner.

But this is wrong!

If a partner truly loves you he would never cheat.

And if someone really loves their partner he trusts him instead of always suspecting him.

But sometimes the reason for jealousy is not the partner but oneself.

  • Self-doubt and low self-esteem is not ruining oneself but also relationships.
  • People think they are not beautiful, not thin or nor smart enough.
  • People transfer their experience of loss into their relationship and can never stop worrying.
  • Sexual betrayals from ex-partners are leading to fears of experiencing such a betrayal once again.

But is there a way to prevent jealousy?

Yes, in most cases there is! Everybody should first love themselves before engaging in a relationship.

Everybody should trust themselves that they are how they should be and that they don’t have to change!

The only thing that cannot be changed easily is abnormal jealousy. These forms of jealousy often need a doctor’s guidance to be eased.

Always keep in mind that abnormal jealousy ruins a relationship instead of protecting it! Be the person you want to be, don’t alter your personality to be to someone’s liking and give as much love as you can!

Becasue being jealous makes your Life harder than i has to be.



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